Journal 14: What I Carry

Since I'm dating (and plans for marrying) an ROTC man I know a lot already about things that are carried by a military guy. I found the short story "The Things They Carried" by Tim O'Brien an insightful piece of literature and useful for people who had never given any thought to what military personnel might carry into battle or on a mission. Or in some cases, what they carried emotionally years after the bullets stopped flying.

If in Lieutenant Jimmy Cross's unit I would have carried the necessities first. A small Bible and my favorite novel, a gun (the type depending on the mission), personal first aid kit, candy, sunscreen/ bug repellent, sun glasses, a compass, bedding, clothing. These are what I see as necessities and the things I know I would want in the field. However as serving in the field grew more strenuous and grueling, I would carry my family and friends left back home closer to my heart. The comrades already lost to enemy bullets and the enemies I had killed would become emotional baggage carried with me for the rest of my life. As strong minded as I believe I am, nothing would ease the pain of the ones I had lost. I would also carry fear. Fear of not knowing what the next day brought, fear of not knowing if I would make it through the night or next battle and fear of losing my life without being able to say good bye to those I love most.

A soldier is meant to carry many things, both physical and mental, but they carry nothing more powerful than their courage to persevere and fight the good fight.  

Journal 13: Bittersweet Dreams

In the story "The School Days of an Indian Girl," author Zitkala-Sa talks about her personal experiences growing up on the reservation and then entering what she calls "the white man's world." It is a personal tale of her struggles to balance both worlds that she lived in, Native American and White. She is sent to learn English and to be educated to be successful in the white man's world but she is constantly unhappy, fearful and it's a forced process. When she decides to go to college, against her mother's will or approval, she writes "Thus, homeless and heavy-hearted, I began anew my life among strangers." This sentence jumped out at me the most because after reading the other portions of her story I realized that this is the first time she is alone in something she is doing unlike in the past experiences she has at least a few people around her to give her support. She uses the world "anew" as the single positive word in the sentence to try and emphasize that there is hope and meaning in what she is doing, even if it is alone. This sentence has a powerful purpose at the beginning of the final section of the reading because this talks about her triumphs in the white man's world. She wins an orator competition on her own and breaks the barrier for her Native people to succeed outside of the reservations. It is the hope at the end of a long journey.

I think that her "American Dream" does come true but in a very bitter sweet way. She achieves it alone without any friends or family around to support her and she has to sacrifice a lot of her old self to get to where she is. However I believe that that is how it should be when someone chases their dreams. Achieving a dream should not come easy. It should come with sacrifice, growth, and self-reliance. Zitkala-Sa does all of these and has a bitter sweet achievement at the end of her long journey.

Blog 12: Hawaii's Queen, Liliuokalani

Quote: "It has been shown that in Hawaii there is an alien element composed of men of energy and determination, well able to carry through what they undertake, but not scrupulous respecting their methods."

Queen Liliuokalani is one of the most intelligent women writers I've had the pleasure of reading. She is articulate, enlightened and worldly, making her writing that which makes the reader think and read twice to understand her meaning. I choose this quote because it is like that. She first says that there is an "alien element composed of men or energy and determination" which with that language, by calling them an "alien element" it degrades the way she sees some of her people as a force of nature, not human. In this way they cannot be controlled because they are driven by their energy and determination. During the time of her decline in power and overthrow, men from the United States saw the riches that Hawaii had to offer the rest of the world, like the perfect soil for pineapples (considered exotic at the time) and sugar cane. Men like Bob Dole were money hungry men with a lot of energy and determination to make something out of the islands of Hawaii, but did not care who they stepped on to get what they wanted.

That is where the second part of the quote I chose comes in, where she writes that they are not "scrupulous respecting their methods." Scrupulous can mean a few different things, but has an overall negative connotation behind it. She means that they fastidious or thorough when carrying out their methods. There are things they forget or choose to ignore. I feel that her word choice of "scrupulous" is key because it means "thorough or careful" but the sentence has so much more power and a negative unspoken jab at the men she talks about when she uses the word "scrupulous." The way she words many of her sentences in her writings have a lot of literary power behind them.